• Custom Roast Book - CustomRoastBook
  • Custom Roast Book - CustomRoastBook
  • Custom Roast Book - CustomRoastBook
  • Custom Roast Book - CustomRoastBook
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QUESTIONNAIRE WILL BE SENT VIA EMAIL AFTER PURCHASE - VIEW QUESTIONNAIRE HERE

Custom Roast Book | Funny Personalised Gift

Custom Roast Book | Funny Personalised Gift

£29.99 GBP
£39.99 GBP £29.99 GBP
⚡️ Lightning Sale ⚡️ Sold out
Taxes included. Shipping calculated at checkout.

We turn your juicy gossip into a premium roast book packed with brutal jokes, fake quotes, and savage banter.

  • Fully Custom
  • Professionally printed
  • Free UK Delivery

QUESTIONNAIRE WILL BE SENT VIA EMAIL AFTER PURCHASE - VIEW QUESTIONNAIRE HERE

Discover the Perfect Personalised Gift with Our Custom Roast Book

The funniest personalised gift in the UK.

Roast your Dad, your mate, your boss - anyone deserves it.
We create a fully custom roast book packed with savage jokes, fake quotes, and brutal banter, all based on the details you give us.

Choose your roast level (Mild, Medium, or Savage) and we'll write, print, and ship a hilarious, one-of-a-kind roast book straight to their door — with free UK delivery.

✅ Funny personalised gift
✅ Perfect for birthdays, retirements, Father's Day and more
✅ High-quality printed book — no boring PDFs or E-books here

Start your roast now, and give them a gift they'll never forget (or forgive).

What Makes a Custom Roast Book Special?

A Custom Roast Book is not just a gift; it's a unique experience tailored to coffee lovers. This book allows users to explore different flavors and roasts, which makes it a great personalised gift for those who appreciate the art of coffee. Each page is designed to detail various roast profiles, so recipients can track their favorites, making their coffee adventure even more engaging.

Customisation Options for a Unique Touch

This personalised gift can be customised in various ways. From adding the recipient's name on the cover to choosing specific roast details, with our information intake form coupled with Roastbot; the possibilities are endless. This versatility means that the gift can reflect the recipient's personality and taste, making it more special. Additionally, this unique approach ensures that no two books are ever the same, so each one becomes a treasured keepsake.

Why Give a Custom Roast Book as a Gift?

Choosing a Custom Roast Book as a gift provides a fantastic opportunity to celebrate special occasions. Whether it's for a birthday, anniversary, or holiday, this personalised gift shows thoughtfulness and consideration.


View full details

Customer Reviews

Based on 14 reviews
71%
(10)
29%
(4)
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A
Ava
Decent

Liked it, but shipping took a bit longer than expected.

E
Ethan
Good for a one-off

Definitely made them laugh. Not something you’d buy twice though.

C
Chloe
Creative

Love the concept, execution was mostly on point.

R
Ray Sutton
Really good gift

Bought one for my Dad, the questionnaire was surprisingly in depth tbf and the jokes were spot on, he loved it - would recommend

M
Maya
Solid

Book looked great. Few jokes could’ve been better but still a fun gift.

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How It Works

Once you’ve placed your order, we’ll email you a confirmation that includes a link to your roast questionnaire.

  • Tell Us About Your Victim

    Fill out our quick form sent to you via email with as many juicy details as you like.

  • We Write the Roast of Their Life

    Our Roastmasters craft a brutal, hilarious, one-of-a-kind book just for them.

  • We Print It and Ship It

    We package their humiliation into a premium book and deliver it straight to their door!
Learn More

Want To Know What You'll Be Asked?

Check out the Questionnaire page for a complete rundown of the questions included in the form you'll be sent.

See Questions

Roasts of the week:

  • “You bring the kind of energy that makes people check their watches.”

  • “You’re like a software bug that no one bothers fixing.”

  • “You peaked in the womb.”

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Every Custom Roast Book is packed with 60-80 brutal, handcrafted jokes based on your inside info.

MediumSavage

You choose how hard we go.

You could buy socks. You could buy aftershave. Or you could destroy their soul for the same price.

The perfect gift for your Dad, boss, estranged family member, anyone!

START ROASTING

Multimedia collage

Book titled 'The Roast of Big Stu' with a yellow cover

Every Custom Roast Book is handcrafted by real human writers — with a little help from our custom-built RoastBot™ AI.

We’ve developed a unique roasting algorithm trained to spot weaknesses, exaggerate personality quirks, and turn ordinary facts into punchline gold. But don’t worry, the AI doesn’t run wild.

Every book is created, reviewed, edited, and perfected by our savage human writing team to make sure the humour hits, the tone lands, and the roast is actually funny (not just robotic nonsense).

Why Roast?

Because "Happy Birthday" cards are for pussies

Fully Custom Roasts

Every joke is handcrafted just for your victim. No boring templates, no mercy.

Premium Printed Books

Beautifully bound, professionally printed, insult-packed masterpieces — not some flimsy PDF.

Free UK Shipping

Your roast gets delivered straight to their door — fast, furious, and postage-paid.

Funny, innit.

We’re not just savage — we’re savagely good.

START YOUR ROAST

FAQ's

What is a Custom Roast Book?

A Custom Roast Book is a one-of-a-kind, personalised roast turned into a professionally printed book.

You tell us who the victim is, give us the inside scoop, and we transform it into 60–80 brutal, hilarious, tailor-made roast jokes. Then we print it, bind it, and ship it directly to their (or your) door.

How does the ordering process work?

  1. Place your order.
  2. Once you check out, you’ll receive an order confirmation email with a link to your Roast Form.
  3. Fill out the form with as many juicy details as you can (or as few — we’ve got backup jokes).
  4. Our team roasts them to perfection.
  5. We print the book and ship it straight to you.

What kind of info do you ask for in the form?

We’ll ask about their name, age, job, hobbies, weird habits, legendary stories, and anything else worth mocking.

The form is quick and fun, and you don’t have to answer everything. The more you give us, the better the roast.

What’s the difference between Standard and Premium?

  • Standard Roast Book: Softcover (paperback), high-quality, durable print, perfect for laughs on a budget.
  • Premium Roast Book: Hardcover, matte finish, sleek and sturdy, a roast worthy of display (or long-term trauma).

    The content inside is the same; it’s just the packaging that changes.

How savage are we talking?

You get to choose the level of pain:

🧁 Mild: Playful teasing. Safe for work, family, and sensitive egos.

🔥 Medium: Biting sarcasm and sharp digs. Not too harsh, not too soft.

🔥🔥 Savage: Ruthless. No filter. Full ego destruction. You've been warned.

How long does it take?

  • Roast writing: 1–3 business days
  • Printing & shipping (UK only): 9–12 business days

Total turnaround: usually within 2 weeks from the day you submit your roast form.

Do you ship outside the UK?

Not yet. Right now we only ship within the UK; but we’re working on international delivery. Sign up to our newsletter to be notified when that changes.

Can I return it?

Because every book is completely custom-written and printed to order, we don’t accept returns for change of mind.

However — if your book arrives damaged, or you’re genuinely unhappy with it, get in touch within 30 days and we’ll make it right.

Check out our Returns Policy for the full details.

What if I don’t give you much info?

That’s totally fine; we’ve got a stockpile of 100+ handcrafted general roast jokes ready to drop in.

But the more personal details you provide, the more brutal (and hilarious) your book will be.

Do you use AI?

Yes — but not the soulless kind.

We use a custom AI roasting tool to help generate and shape the jokes, but every book is reviewed and edited by a real human to make sure it’s sharp, funny, and actually makes sense.

AI helps us write faster. Humans make it sting.

What does the book actually look like?

Every book includes:

  • A custom cover
  • 60–80 savage jokes tailored to your victim
  • A funny intro and outro
  • High-quality printing (standard or hardcover)

It’s a gift they’ll never forget — or forgive.